How many times do we have to go over this?

I'm going to make this very simple. Get over me.

oh fuckfuckfuckfuck

I'm am the biggest twat in the history  of the world. last night, I made the great  mistake of telling the boy I like, let's call him Ben, that he didn't know me.... now, this would have been fine if Ben was a run of the mill, everyday boy... but he's not. He said "tell me what need to know?" the conversation that followed was horrible and I gave him a very brief summary of what happened between the evil ex boyfriend and I. He took it amazingly! We then went on to talk about rugby and cuddling and I went to bed rather happy with myself and now I'm severely doubting if things Went as  well as I seem to think they did. We haven't spoken since last night and I'm worried now he's had a glimpse at the inside of my head he won't  want me any more. To be completely honest I'm not sure if he liked me anyway but grrrr now I might not find out...

argh

So today I had a conversation with the boy I like. And I had to explain why I didn't want to explain how not right I am. I know, it doesn't  make sense at all. I now have to make a decision... do I explain that I am Fifty Shades of Fucked Up of do I sit and carry on with this show?